Fun on the Web vol 6 Issue 16

Fun on the weekly web and other chuckles
Volume 6 Issue 16 July 23, 2007

Well the long awaited final chapters in the Harry Potter
series were finally made public and the next two links
deal with the book so don't peak if you think it will spoil
it for you. Of course if you have already read it. . .read on.

Review from the NYTimes
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/07/18/books/18cnd-potter.html

What fun
http://entertainment.timesonline.co.uk/tol/arts_and_entertainment/books/article2112840.ece

What to do if your identity or wallet are stolen? Before and
after tips are here on Not Martha
http://www.notmartha.org/archives/2007/07/04/stop-thief/#more-2134

Wondering about Linked In or Facebook? Here is a great
description with examples:
http://ziffdavisitlink.leveragesoftware.com/blog_post_view.aspx?BlogPostID=bece013c223d4ef5ad0334ebd7350ede

Great Video http://baynhamtyers.com/index.html?http://baynhamtyers.com/Services/Business_Image/image_viral_frameset.html?http://baynhamtyers.com/contraptionII.html http://www.boingboing.net/2007/06/26/index.html

PC World announces their picks for 100 Best Websites http://www.pcworld.com/article/id,133119-page,2-c,sites/article.html

Does anyone know of any WI equivalent?http://www.reuters.com/article/inDepthNews/idUSN0530157720070619
New age town embraces dollar alternative

"a conservative encyclopedia you can trust."??? That
remains to be seen
http://www.conservapedia.com/

Thanks to Mike for sending me to this interesting writer:
http://www.violentacres.com/most-popular-posts

Spooky
http://www.niehs.nih.gov/kids/mindread/psychicSparkle2.swf

More Sudoku - this is a free program
http://komando.com/downloads/category.aspx?id=2307

More games
http://www.miniclip.com/games/en/webmaster-games.php

Do you save points?
http://www.pointmaven.com/

or Miles use these sites to get the most out of them
http://www.milemaven.com/

On to the chuckles:
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Of course the game is rigged. Don't let that stop you--if you
don't play, you can't win. ~~ Robert Heinlein

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If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd
have to say that the universe aimed rather low and settled
for very little. - George Carlin

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Patience is passion tamed. ~~ Lyman Abbott

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Those who love deeply never grow old; they may die of
old age, but they die young. ~~ A.W. Pinero

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Anything too stupid to be said is sung. - Voltaire

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My way of joking is to tell the truth. It is the funniest joke in the world.
- George Bernard Shaw

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Points to Ponder

Back off!! You're standing in my aura."

"Practice random acts of intelligence and senseless
acts of self-control."

Does killing time damage eternity?

All the world's a stage, and I missed rehearsal.

Always proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

The most wasted day is that in which we have not laughed!

Who's General Failure & why's he reading my disk?

RAM Disk is not an installation procedure.

All Wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?

A cynic smells flowers and looks for the casket.

'Veni, Vidi, Velcro' - I came, I saw, I stuck around.

A new study shows that licking the sweat off a frog can
cure depression. The down side is, the minute you stop
licking, the frog gets depressed again.

If we all are here to help others, then what exactly are
others here for?

Two people in every one is a schizophrenic.

Next time someone asks,'Did you sleep well?' answer them
with your most sincere 'No, I made a couple of mistakes.'
and watch their reaction.'

If a tin whistle is made out of tin, then what, exactly, is a fog
horn made out of?

If atheists say there is no God, who do they think pops
up the next Kleenex in the box?

I have to stop now. My fingers are getting hoarse!

If I save time, when do I get it back?

May I please be excused? My Brain is full.

My family coat of arms ties at the back.....is that normal?

My other computer is an abacus.

Whadya mean my grandparents didn't have any kids!?!

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This blonde and her girlfriend were talking about the usual
thing blondes and their girlfriends talk about over a latte at
Starbuck's.

"My boyfriend just has the most awful dandruff," confided
the blonde.

"Have you ever given him Head and Shoulders?," her
empathetic gal friend asked earnestly.

"MMMMmmmmmmmmmm," the blonde pondered.

"How do you give shoulders?"

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Coach's Instructions - A must read for Grandparents. Those
who aren't will love it, too.

At one point during a game, the coach called one of his 9-year-
old baseball players aside and asked, "Do you understand what
cooperation is? What a team is?"

The little boy nodded in the affirmative.

"Do you understand that what matters is whether we win or
lose together as a team?"

The little boy nodded yes.

"So," the coach continued, "I'm sure you know, when an out
is called, you shouldn't argue, curse, attack the umpire, or
call him a pecker-head. Do you understand all that?

Again the little boy nodded.

He continued, "And when I take you out of the game so
another boy gets a chance to play, it's not good sportsmanship
to call your coach 'a dumb ass' is it?"

Again the little boy nodded.

"Good," said the coach. "Now go over there and explain all
that to your grandmother".

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Thanks to Sheila for these:

Top Ten Things Men SHOULDN'T Say Out Loud In

Victoria's Secret:

#10 Does this come in children's sizes?

#9 No Thanks. Just Sniffing.

#8 I'll be in the dressing room going blind.

#7 Mom will love this.

#6 Oh the size won't matter. She's inflatable.

#5 No need to wrap it up. I'll eat it here.

#4 Will you model this for me???

#3 The Miracle What??? This is better than world peace!!

#2 45 bucks?? You're just gonna end up NAKED anyway!!

And the number one thing that a man should never,
ever say out loud in Victoria's Secret:

#1 Oh, honey, you'll never squeeze your ass into that.

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Let there be lightning
A bolt of lightning blew the hand and part of a foot off a
marble statue hundreds worship every Sunday at a
Catholic summer camp for orphans in Golden, Colorado.
Thankfully, the organization that runs the camp has
insurance for the valuable statute - which was brought
from Italy to the US by a Saint in 1954...

But ironically, the policy may not cover damage from "acts
of God." The camp's Sisters are taking donations to help
repair the damage until insurance officials can make the
determination. Whether the strike was punishment from
The Almighty for un-absolved sins of camp attendees or
staff may never be known.

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Lettuce not be victims Bravo to Briton George Smith, the
82-year-old pensioner who really used his "head" to foil a
gun-toting store robber. The WWII veteran octogenarian
belted the would-be bandit twice in the face - with an iceberg
lettuce he grabbed off the shelf!

Dazed by the vegetable barrage, the shotgun-wielding thief
fled the scene, escaping British police - on a bicycle! According
to The Sun UK, he is believed to be the same crook who
made off with £1000 in one of 3 earlier robberies with the
same MO. Hmmm. Four attempted robberies by a man
carrying a shotgun and riding a BIKE. No arrests. Gotta
love that British SWAT response...

The man in the un-ironed mask
Only in West Virginia. According to an Associated Press article
from May 10, a thief armed only with one of those cigarette
lighters that looks like a derringer tried to rob a convenience
store in the Mountain State town of Inwood... He didn't get
away with any money because the clerk behind the counter
thought the robbery attempt was a joke - but NOT because
of the obviously fake lighter-gun. It's because the robber
was wearing a pair of light blue women's panties on his head
as a mask!

Police apprehended a suspect a short time later in a vehicle
matching the car the "masked" man drove off in. Whether
or not they made him stand in a lineup with the panties on
his head is unknown

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Hope you enjoyed my fun on the web this week!

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Thanks and have a great week!

Copyright 2007 by Shane and Associates